I think I’ve finally hit a wall with that novel writing thing. Now that the characters are sort of formed, I have to go back and back again to whatever I’ve already written in order not to contradict myself too much. Things happen so quickly! And I’m trying very hard not to make my “heroine” sound like a whimp, even if she’s been through some nasty things in her life. Good part of it is her own fault, and she has to realize it herself, but how do you do that without making her a whimper and whiner? Difficult stuff, man! But I’ll keep trying, definetely.

All in all it’s quite fun. Just the possibility of writing outrageous things without compromising yourself with it (or the “seriousness” of whatever else you want to right) is quite bevrijding. I feel quite free, even though I start looking back not to loose myself too much. Maybe next time I’ll feel even more free and just allow myself to be totally outrageous. We’ll see.

I’m still wondering if I found my own writing voice, but I think I’ll still be wondering that same thing in 20 or 30 years time. So no reason to keep wondering, right? Wrong!

Ah well, let’s forget about it right now. It’s late, hubby is waiting in bed and I really want to just go cuddle and be warm. Nights (and days) are getting colder and colder and my warm blood doesn’t allow me to stay in the cold too long……


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